A Guide to Managing Stress in Crisis Response Profession
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on Crisis Response and Crisis
Counseling CEUs
CHAPTER I. Understanding the Stress Cycle
Common Stress Reactions
Extreme Stress Reactions
Stress is an elevation in a person's state of arousal or readiness, caused by some stimulus or demand. As stress arousal increases, health and performance actually improve. Within manageable levels, stress can help sharpen our attention and mobilize our bodies to cope with threatening situations.
At some point, stress arousal reaches maximum effect. Once it does, all that was gained by stress arousal is then lost and deterioration of health and performance begins (Luxart Communications, 2004).
Whether a stressor is a slight change in posture or a lifethreatening assault, the brain determines when the body's inner equilibrium is disturbed; the brain initiates the actions that restore the balance. The brain decides what is threatening and what is not. When we face challenging situations, the brain does a quick search. Have we been here before? If so, how did we feel? What was the outcome? Can we cope with the situation now? If there's doubt as to any of these questions, the stress response goes into high gear (McEwen & Lasley, 2002).
The following provides workers and managers with a list of common stress reactions. Most people are resilient and experience mild or transient psychological disturbances from which they readily bounce back. The stress response becomes problematic when it does not or cannot turn off; that is, when symptoms last too long or interfere with daily life.
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Common Stress Reactions
Behavioral
Increase or decrease in activity level
Substance use or abuse (alcohol or drugs)
Difficulty communicating or listening
Irritability, outbursts of anger, frequent arguments
Inability to rest or relax
Decline in job performance; absenteeism
Frequent crying
Hyper-vigilance or excessive worry
Avoidance of activities or places that trigger memories
Becoming accident prone
Physical
Gastrointestinal problems
Headaches, other aches and pains
Visual disturbances
Weight loss or gain
Sweating or chills
Tremors or muscle twitching
Being easily startled
Chronic fatigue or sleep disturbances
Immune system disorders
Psychological/Emotional
Feeling heroic, euphoric, or invulnerable
Denial
Anxiety or fear
Depression
Guilt
Apathy
Grief
Thinking
Memory problems
Disorientation and confusion
Slow thought processes; lack of concentration
Difficulty setting priorities or making decisions
Loss of objectivity
Social
Isolation
Blaming
Difficulty in giving or accepting support or help
Inability to experience pleasure or have fun
(Adapted from CMHS, 2004)
First the brain sounds an alert to the adrenal glands. The adrenals answer by pouring out the first of the major stress hormones—adrenaline—for the classic fight-orflight response.
The fight-or-flight response evolved with the prime directive of ensuring our safety and survival. The pulse begins to race as the adrenaline steps up the heart rate, sending extra blood to the muscles and organs. Oxygen rushes in as the bronchial tubes in the lungs dilate; extra oxygen also reaches the brain, which helps keep us alert. During this stage of the fight-or-flight response, the brain releases natural painkillers called endorphins. This phase, in which adrenaline plays a leading role, is the immediate response to stress (McEwen & Lasley, 2002).
When the stress response is active for a long period of time, it can damage the cardiovascular, immune, and nervous systems. People develop patterns of response to stress that are as varied as the individuals (Selye, 1984). These responses simply suggest a need for corrective action to limit their impact (Mitchell & Bray, 1990; Selye, 1984).
Acknowledgments
This publication was produced by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), Center for Mental Health Services (CMHS), U.S. Department of Health and Human Services (DHHS) and was reviewed by a group of experts. Ms. Maria Baldi served as the Government project officer. The SAMHSA Disaster Technical Assistance Center (operated by ESI under contract with CMHS), researched, compiled, and edited the information, and designed the cover and layout for this publication. SAMHSA gratefully acknowledges the contributions of Nancy C. Carter, M.S.W.
Public Domain Notice
All material appearing in this document is in the public domain and may be reproduced or copied without permission from SAMHSA or CMHS. Citation of the source is appreciated. However, this publication may not be reproduced or distributed for a fee without the specific, written authorization of the Office of Communications, SAMHSA, DHHS.
Electronic Access and Copies of Publication
This publication may be accessed electronically through the following Internet connection: www.samhsa.gov. For additional free copies of this document, please contact SAMHSA's National Mental Health Information Center at 1-800-789-2647 or 1-866-889-2647 (TDD).
Citation
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. A Guide to Managing Stress in Crisis Response Professions. DHHS Pub. No. SMA 4113. Rockville, MD: Center for Mental Health Services, Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration, 2005.
Originating Office
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration
1 Choke Cherry Road, Rockville, Maryland 20857
DHHS Publication No. SMA 4113
Printed 2005
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Human Sexuality
© 2009 by Aspira Continuing Education. All rights reserved. No part of this material may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, mechanical or electronic without written permission of Aspira Continuing Education. Course Objectives: This course is designed to help you: 1. Define the different study/research areas of human sexuality. 2. Increase familiarity with concepts related to the psychology of sex 3. Identify and evaluate clinical perspectives related to sexual activity and lifestyles. 4. Explore the impact religious belief systems on sex. 5. Learn specific laws related to sex and sexual crimes. 6. Identify the causes and symptoms of STDs 7. Increase familiarity with sexual disorders Table of Contents: 1. Definition 2. Psychology and Sex 3. Sexual Activity and Lifestyles 4. Religion and Sex 5. The Law and Sex 6. Sexually Transmitted Diseases 7. Masters and Johnson
8. Sexual Disorders 9. References 1. Definition Human sexuality can be defined as the manner in which people experience and express themselves as sexual beings. There are many facets in the study of human sexuality including: • Biological • Emotional • Physical • Sociological • Philosophical (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). From a biological perspective, sexuality is defined as “the reproductive mechanism as well as the basic biological drive that exists in all species and can encompass sexual intercourse and sexual contact in all its forms”. There are also emotional or physical perspectives of sexuality, which refers to the “bond that exists between individuals, which may be expressed through
profound feelings or emotions, and which may be manifested in physical or medical concerns about the physiological or even psychological aspects of sexual behavior”. Sociologically, it includes the cultural, political, and legal aspects of sexual behavior. Philosophically, it emphasizes the moral, ethical, theological, spiritual or religious aspects of sexual behavior (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Human sexuality research has revealed that sexual variables are significant in developing one’s identity and to social evolution of individuals: “Human sexuality is not simply imposed by instinct or stereotypical conducts, as it happens in animals, but it is influenced both by superior mental activity and by social, cultural, educational and normative characteristics of those places where the subjects grow up and their personality develops. Consequently, the analysis of sexual sphere must be based on the convergence of several lines of development such as affectivity, emotions and relations” (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). The biological aspects of human sexuality include human reproduction and other aspects such as organic and neurological responses, heredity, hormonal issues, gender issues and sexual dysfunction (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Additionally, human sexuality can be conceptualized as inclusive of the social life of humans, governed by implied rules of behavior. Of course, this involves cultural and societal influences including media such as politics and the mass media. Historically, media has caused significant changes in sexual social norms such as the sexual revolution (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). 2. Psychology and Sex Human sexual experience can include significant emotional and psychological responses. Research studies on sexuality focus on psychological influences that impact sexual behavior and experience. Early psychological analyses were conducted by Sigmund Freud. He also introduced the concepts of erogenous zones, psychosexual development, and
the Oedipus complex (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Behaviorists including John B. Watson and B. F. Skinner evaluate the connection between behavior theory and sex. For example, they might study a child who is punished for sexual exploration and see if they grow up to associate negative feelings with sex in general. Social-learning theorists use similar concepts, but focus on cognitive activity and modeling (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Gender identity is “a person's own sense of identification as female, male, both, neither, or somewhere in between”. The social construction of gender has been discussed by a wide variety of scholars, Judith Butler notable among them. Recent contributions consider the influence of feminist theory and courtship research (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Human sexual behavior encompasses the search for a partner or partners, interactions between individuals, physical, emotional intimacy, and sexual contact. Unprotected sex may result unwanted pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases. Prior to reliable contraception methods, controlling sexual behavior was practically important to parents in some societies. The methodologies employed by parents to try to prevent their children from prematurely becoming parents themselves could have a profound effect on the minds of those children (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Sexual behavior Sexual function is impacted significantly by cognitive process. Male sexual dysfunction includes inability to achieve an erection, penile insensitivity, premature ejaculation. Female sexual dysfunction includes inability to achieve orgasm and vaginismus. The dysfunctions described may contribute to the development of secondary problems. For example, sufferers may self medicate with substances. Sexual dysfunction clinical focus may include addressing low self esteem, guilt, and self-destructive impulses. Freud
claimed that neither predominantly different, nor same-sex sexuality was the norm. instead he argued that bisexuality is the normal human condition thwarted by society. A 1901 medical dictionary lists heterosexuality as "perverted" different-sex attraction, while by the 1960s its use in all forums referred to "normal" different-sex sexuality. In 1948 Alfred Kinsey publishes Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, popularly known as the Kinsey Reports (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). For many years, homosexuality was classified as a psychiatric disorder. In 1973 homosexuality was declassified as a mental illness in the United Kingdom. In 1986 homosexuality as a psychiatric disorder was removed from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) of the American Psychiatric Association (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). 3. Sexual Activity and Lifestyles Different-sex sexual practices are limited by laws in many places. In some countries, mostly those where religion has a strong influence on social policy, marriage laws serve the purpose of encouraging people to only have sex within marriage. Laws also ban adults from committing sexual abuse, committing sexual acts with anyone under an age of consent, performing sexual activities in public, and engaging in sexual activities for money. Heterosexual activities may be monogamous, serially monogamous, or polyamorous, and, depending on the definition of sexual practice, abstinent or autoerotic (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History).
8. Sexual Disorders 9. References 1. Definition Human sexuality can be defined as the manner in which people experience and express themselves as sexual beings. There are many facets in the study of human sexuality including: • Biological • Emotional • Physical • Sociological • Philosophical (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). From a biological perspective, sexuality is defined as “the reproductive mechanism as well as the basic biological drive that exists in all species and can encompass sexual intercourse and sexual contact in all its forms”. There are also emotional or physical perspectives of sexuality, which refers to the “bond that exists between individuals, which may be expressed through
profound feelings or emotions, and which may be manifested in physical or medical concerns about the physiological or even psychological aspects of sexual behavior”. Sociologically, it includes the cultural, political, and legal aspects of sexual behavior. Philosophically, it emphasizes the moral, ethical, theological, spiritual or religious aspects of sexual behavior (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Human sexuality research has revealed that sexual variables are significant in developing one’s identity and to social evolution of individuals: “Human sexuality is not simply imposed by instinct or stereotypical conducts, as it happens in animals, but it is influenced both by superior mental activity and by social, cultural, educational and normative characteristics of those places where the subjects grow up and their personality develops. Consequently, the analysis of sexual sphere must be based on the convergence of several lines of development such as affectivity, emotions and relations” (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). The biological aspects of human sexuality include human reproduction and other aspects such as organic and neurological responses, heredity, hormonal issues, gender issues and sexual dysfunction (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Additionally, human sexuality can be conceptualized as inclusive of the social life of humans, governed by implied rules of behavior. Of course, this involves cultural and societal influences including media such as politics and the mass media. Historically, media has caused significant changes in sexual social norms such as the sexual revolution (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). 2. Psychology and Sex Human sexual experience can include significant emotional and psychological responses. Research studies on sexuality focus on psychological influences that impact sexual behavior and experience. Early psychological analyses were conducted by Sigmund Freud. He also introduced the concepts of erogenous zones, psychosexual development, and
the Oedipus complex (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Behaviorists including John B. Watson and B. F. Skinner evaluate the connection between behavior theory and sex. For example, they might study a child who is punished for sexual exploration and see if they grow up to associate negative feelings with sex in general. Social-learning theorists use similar concepts, but focus on cognitive activity and modeling (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Gender identity is “a person's own sense of identification as female, male, both, neither, or somewhere in between”. The social construction of gender has been discussed by a wide variety of scholars, Judith Butler notable among them. Recent contributions consider the influence of feminist theory and courtship research (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Human sexual behavior encompasses the search for a partner or partners, interactions between individuals, physical, emotional intimacy, and sexual contact. Unprotected sex may result unwanted pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases. Prior to reliable contraception methods, controlling sexual behavior was practically important to parents in some societies. The methodologies employed by parents to try to prevent their children from prematurely becoming parents themselves could have a profound effect on the minds of those children (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). Sexual behavior Sexual function is impacted significantly by cognitive process. Male sexual dysfunction includes inability to achieve an erection, penile insensitivity, premature ejaculation. Female sexual dysfunction includes inability to achieve orgasm and vaginismus. The dysfunctions described may contribute to the development of secondary problems. For example, sufferers may self medicate with substances. Sexual dysfunction clinical focus may include addressing low self esteem, guilt, and self-destructive impulses. Freud
claimed that neither predominantly different, nor same-sex sexuality was the norm. instead he argued that bisexuality is the normal human condition thwarted by society. A 1901 medical dictionary lists heterosexuality as "perverted" different-sex attraction, while by the 1960s its use in all forums referred to "normal" different-sex sexuality. In 1948 Alfred Kinsey publishes Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, popularly known as the Kinsey Reports (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). For many years, homosexuality was classified as a psychiatric disorder. In 1973 homosexuality was declassified as a mental illness in the United Kingdom. In 1986 homosexuality as a psychiatric disorder was removed from the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) of the American Psychiatric Association (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History). 3. Sexual Activity and Lifestyles Different-sex sexual practices are limited by laws in many places. In some countries, mostly those where religion has a strong influence on social policy, marriage laws serve the purpose of encouraging people to only have sex within marriage. Laws also ban adults from committing sexual abuse, committing sexual acts with anyone under an age of consent, performing sexual activities in public, and engaging in sexual activities for money. Heterosexual activities may be monogamous, serially monogamous, or polyamorous, and, depending on the definition of sexual practice, abstinent or autoerotic (Ellen Ross, Rayna Rapp Sex and Society: A Research Note from Social History and Anthropology Comparative Studies in Society and History).
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Conflict Resolution CEUs
Copyright 2009 by Aspira Continuing Education. All rights reserved. No part of this material may be transmitted or reproduced in any form, or by any means, mechanical or electronic without written permission of Aspira Continuing Education.
1. Define the process of conflict resolution 2. Learn specific conflict resolution techniques 3. Identify various theoretical approaches to conflict resolution 4. Identify the barriers to conflict resolution 5. Clinically address the barriers to conflict resolution Table of Contents: 1. Definition 2. Causes 3. Assessment and Intervention 4. Resources 5. References
1. Definition
Conflict resolution includes several techniques and processes designed to decrease or manage conflict in relationships. The term "conflict resolution" is sometimes used interchangeably with the term dispute resolution or alternative dispute resolution. Conflict resolution may sometimes include negotiation, mediation and diplomacy. Conflict resolution has been the source of research in animals such as dogs and primates (Frans de Waal, 2000). Studies have demonstrated that aggression is more common among relatives and within a group, than between groups. Instead of creating a distance between the individuals, however, the primates were more intimate in the period after the aggressive incident. These intimacies consisted of grooming and various forms of body contact. Stress responses, like an increased heart rate, usually decrease after these reconciliatory signals. Different types of primates, as well as many other species living in groups, show different types of conciliatory behavior. Resolving conflicts that threaten the interaction between individuals in a group is necessary for survival, hence has a strong evolutionary value. These findings contradicted previous existing theories about the general function of aggression, i.e. creating space between individuals (Konrad Lorenz), which seems to be more the case in group conflicts (Frans de Waal, 2000). Conflict is an unavoidable consequence of natural disagreements resulting from individuals or groups that differ in beliefs, attitudes, values or needs. Conflict may also originate from past rivalries and personality differences. Other causes of conflict include attempting to negotiate prematurely or before necessary information is available. The following includes common sources of conflict: • communication failure • personality conflict • value differences • goal differences • methodological differences • substandard performance • lack of cooperation • differences regarding authority • differences regarding responsibility • competition over resources • non-compliance with rules 2. Causes Structural Factors (How the conflict is set up) • Authority Relationships • Common Resources • Goal Differences • Interdependence • Jurisdictional Ambiguities • Specialization • Status inconsistencies • Personal Factors • Communication barriers • Conflict management style • Cultural differences • Emotions • Perception • Personalities • Skills and abilities • Values and Ethics There are many variables intertwined with conflict including behavioral, physiological, cognitive variables. • Behavioral- The manner in which the emotional experience is expressed which can be verbal or non-verbal and internalized or externalized. • Physiological- The bodily experience of emotion. The way emotions make us feel in relationship to our identity. • Cognitive- The concept that we "assess or appraise" an event to reveal its relevancy to ourselves.
The following three variables demonstrate that the meanings of emotional experience and expression are determined by cultural values, beliefs, and practices: • Cultural values- cultural values and norms influence, "which emotions ought to be expressed in particular situations" and "what emotions are to be felt." • Physical- This escalation results from "anger or frustration." • Verbal- This escalation results from "negative perceptions of the offender’s character." There are several principles of conflict and emotion including: 1. Conflict is emotionally defined. Conflict involves emotion because something "triggers" it. The conflict is with the parties involved and how they decide to resolve it. Events that trigger conflict are events that elicit emotion. 2. Conflict is emotionally varied. Emotion levels during conflict can be intense or less intense. The "intensity" levels "may be indicative of the importance and meaning of the conflict issues for each party”. 3. Conflict invokes a moral stance. When an event occurs it can be interpreted as moral or immoral. The judging of this morality "influences one's orientation to the conflict, relationship to the parties involved, and the conflict issues". 4. Conflict is identity based. Emotions and identity are a part of conflict. When a person knows their values, beliefs, and morals they are able to determine whether the conflict is personal, relevant, and moral. "Identity related conflicts are potentially more destructive." 5. Conflict is relational. "Conflict is relational in the sense that emotional communication conveys relational definitions that impact conflict." "Key relational elements are power and social status." (Joyce Hocker-Wilmot, William W. Wilmot, 2006. Interpersonal conflict, Iowa: Won C. Brown Com).
1. Define the process of conflict resolution 2. Learn specific conflict resolution techniques 3. Identify various theoretical approaches to conflict resolution 4. Identify the barriers to conflict resolution 5. Clinically address the barriers to conflict resolution Table of Contents: 1. Definition 2. Causes 3. Assessment and Intervention 4. Resources 5. References
1. Definition
Conflict resolution includes several techniques and processes designed to decrease or manage conflict in relationships. The term "conflict resolution" is sometimes used interchangeably with the term dispute resolution or alternative dispute resolution. Conflict resolution may sometimes include negotiation, mediation and diplomacy. Conflict resolution has been the source of research in animals such as dogs and primates (Frans de Waal, 2000). Studies have demonstrated that aggression is more common among relatives and within a group, than between groups. Instead of creating a distance between the individuals, however, the primates were more intimate in the period after the aggressive incident. These intimacies consisted of grooming and various forms of body contact. Stress responses, like an increased heart rate, usually decrease after these reconciliatory signals. Different types of primates, as well as many other species living in groups, show different types of conciliatory behavior. Resolving conflicts that threaten the interaction between individuals in a group is necessary for survival, hence has a strong evolutionary value. These findings contradicted previous existing theories about the general function of aggression, i.e. creating space between individuals (Konrad Lorenz), which seems to be more the case in group conflicts (Frans de Waal, 2000). Conflict is an unavoidable consequence of natural disagreements resulting from individuals or groups that differ in beliefs, attitudes, values or needs. Conflict may also originate from past rivalries and personality differences. Other causes of conflict include attempting to negotiate prematurely or before necessary information is available. The following includes common sources of conflict: • communication failure • personality conflict • value differences • goal differences • methodological differences • substandard performance • lack of cooperation • differences regarding authority • differences regarding responsibility • competition over resources • non-compliance with rules 2. Causes Structural Factors (How the conflict is set up) • Authority Relationships • Common Resources • Goal Differences • Interdependence • Jurisdictional Ambiguities • Specialization • Status inconsistencies • Personal Factors • Communication barriers • Conflict management style • Cultural differences • Emotions • Perception • Personalities • Skills and abilities • Values and Ethics There are many variables intertwined with conflict including behavioral, physiological, cognitive variables. • Behavioral- The manner in which the emotional experience is expressed which can be verbal or non-verbal and internalized or externalized. • Physiological- The bodily experience of emotion. The way emotions make us feel in relationship to our identity. • Cognitive- The concept that we "assess or appraise" an event to reveal its relevancy to ourselves.
The following three variables demonstrate that the meanings of emotional experience and expression are determined by cultural values, beliefs, and practices: • Cultural values- cultural values and norms influence, "which emotions ought to be expressed in particular situations" and "what emotions are to be felt." • Physical- This escalation results from "anger or frustration." • Verbal- This escalation results from "negative perceptions of the offender’s character." There are several principles of conflict and emotion including: 1. Conflict is emotionally defined. Conflict involves emotion because something "triggers" it. The conflict is with the parties involved and how they decide to resolve it. Events that trigger conflict are events that elicit emotion. 2. Conflict is emotionally varied. Emotion levels during conflict can be intense or less intense. The "intensity" levels "may be indicative of the importance and meaning of the conflict issues for each party”. 3. Conflict invokes a moral stance. When an event occurs it can be interpreted as moral or immoral. The judging of this morality "influences one's orientation to the conflict, relationship to the parties involved, and the conflict issues". 4. Conflict is identity based. Emotions and identity are a part of conflict. When a person knows their values, beliefs, and morals they are able to determine whether the conflict is personal, relevant, and moral. "Identity related conflicts are potentially more destructive." 5. Conflict is relational. "Conflict is relational in the sense that emotional communication conveys relational definitions that impact conflict." "Key relational elements are power and social status." (Joyce Hocker-Wilmot, William W. Wilmot, 2006. Interpersonal conflict, Iowa: Won C. Brown Com).
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Changing Relationships Aging and Long Term Care
With people living longer than ever
before, more and more individuals
find themselves sandwiched between
caring for their children and caring for
their aging parents.
Coping with our fast-paced,
always-connected world is stressful
enough, but when you add double or
triple the family responsibilities, well,
it quickly gets overwhelming.
You’re probably losing time and
energy worrying about things that
aren’t getting done or things you have
to do next. You may not realize just
how much physical and mental stress
you are under, or how much that has
been sapping your effectiveness at
work and at home. Guilt may be a
constant companion. While you take
care of your parents, you may feel
that you’re not doing enough for your
children, and vice versa.
You may experience feelings of
grief and loss, as you see your parents
changing and the roles of your family
shifting. You may also feel fearful and
anxious about your parent’s mortality,
and that gets you thinking about
your own.
With all of the extra time you need
to take care of others, there is less
time—if any—to spend on yourself
and the things that recharge you.
Here are five ways to take care of
yourself while taking care of your
aging parents.
1. First, meet your own needs.
You can’t help anyone else if you are
so sapped of energy and joy that you
are miserable and lifeless. Block out
time every day for something that’s
just for you. Give equal attention to
your emotional, spiritual and physical
needs. Protect that time as your most
important appointment—because it is!
2. Get support for your parents.
Seek out government and community
resources for home care, medications,
support groups, mobility aids and
adaptive equipment. Keep organized
records of your parents’ medical
history, as well as the contact
information and recommendations of
everyone you consult with. You will
rest easier knowing that professionals
are involved and you’re not trying
to make decisions that you’re not
qualified to make.
3. Get support for yourself.
Reach out to supportive friends or
family members; even a short phone
call can give you a much-needed lift.
Also, seek out a support group, or
individual therapy or counseling.
4. Banish guilt. Accept that you’re
doing your best and acknowledge
the efforts you’re making. Actually
list them on paper if you need to! If
you notice yourself feeling guilty, ask
yourself if you would want someone
in the same situation as yours to feel
guilty. The answer, certainly, is no.
5. Celebrate life and family.
As your family changes, focus on
remembering and sharing positive
memories of your life together. Also,
create new rituals and traditions
that everyone can participate in, such
as sing-alongs, games, crafts or
nature walks.
Start right now with even one
of these strategies. It will feel like
a breath of fresh air, loosening the
grip of your tightly packed life and
infusing your entire family with
renewed energy and joy**
before, more and more individuals
find themselves sandwiched between
caring for their children and caring for
their aging parents.
Coping with our fast-paced,
always-connected world is stressful
enough, but when you add double or
triple the family responsibilities, well,
it quickly gets overwhelming.
You’re probably losing time and
energy worrying about things that
aren’t getting done or things you have
to do next. You may not realize just
how much physical and mental stress
you are under, or how much that has
been sapping your effectiveness at
work and at home. Guilt may be a
constant companion. While you take
care of your parents, you may feel
that you’re not doing enough for your
children, and vice versa.
You may experience feelings of
grief and loss, as you see your parents
changing and the roles of your family
shifting. You may also feel fearful and
anxious about your parent’s mortality,
and that gets you thinking about
your own.
With all of the extra time you need
to take care of others, there is less
time—if any—to spend on yourself
and the things that recharge you.
Here are five ways to take care of
yourself while taking care of your
aging parents.
1. First, meet your own needs.
You can’t help anyone else if you are
so sapped of energy and joy that you
are miserable and lifeless. Block out
time every day for something that’s
just for you. Give equal attention to
your emotional, spiritual and physical
needs. Protect that time as your most
important appointment—because it is!
2. Get support for your parents.
Seek out government and community
resources for home care, medications,
support groups, mobility aids and
adaptive equipment. Keep organized
records of your parents’ medical
history, as well as the contact
information and recommendations of
everyone you consult with. You will
rest easier knowing that professionals
are involved and you’re not trying
to make decisions that you’re not
qualified to make.
3. Get support for yourself.
Reach out to supportive friends or
family members; even a short phone
call can give you a much-needed lift.
Also, seek out a support group, or
individual therapy or counseling.
4. Banish guilt. Accept that you’re
doing your best and acknowledge
the efforts you’re making. Actually
list them on paper if you need to! If
you notice yourself feeling guilty, ask
yourself if you would want someone
in the same situation as yours to feel
guilty. The answer, certainly, is no.
5. Celebrate life and family.
As your family changes, focus on
remembering and sharing positive
memories of your life together. Also,
create new rituals and traditions
that everyone can participate in, such
as sing-alongs, games, crafts or
nature walks.
Start right now with even one
of these strategies. It will feel like
a breath of fresh air, loosening the
grip of your tightly packed life and
infusing your entire family with
renewed energy and joy**
The Pusuit of Happiness, our Need for Continuing Education
Is there really such a thing? I mean happiness is an emotion that comes and goes rather than a condition isn't it? I feel badly for those who invest so much in achieving "happiness" as some sort of destination or something. Unfortunately, many of us base our state of mind and emotional state on circumstances rather than variables that are more permanent.
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